I knew something was up yesterday...didn't feel right and then today happened. Without going into grave details...I lost the baby today.
Very heartbreaking, and after 3 of these now...it does not get any easier. Lots of questions as to why that will never be answered. I think the reason why this one is a bit more harder to take, is that we were not even trying to get pregnant....it was a surprise, and then to get used to the idea of 3 kids just to have it end like this. I can't beat myself up about this, I could analyze every last step over the past 2 weeks, but it won't change anything. The fact of the matter is that it was not meant to be.
As I mourn the loss of this baby, I look at my two daughters and realise that if I never had the past 2 miscarriages, they would not be here. I came home after my ultrasound that confirmed that I was miscarrying the baby, to Reese meeting me at the door. She didn't know what was wrong, but she lead me upstairs and tucked me in and stroked my hair and told me everything will be alright.
I am very blessed with a great family and I love the support from all my friends. We will get through this and all will be okay. What is it they always say, "What doesn't kill us, makes us stronger"???
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3 comments:
Aww,, sweet cheeks, I am so sorry for you guys.... ok, the part about Reese made me cry :( what a sweeheart!!
You're right though,, it happened for a reason-- it may be hard to understand now, but there has to be a reason.
You've been blessed with 2 beautiful babies and you are an amazing mommy,, you guys'll get through these tough emotional times:)
Sheila
Ohhh NO!!! I am so so sorry Nicki. Just remember it's all in God's plan and we never know WHY He plans things this way, (at least not at the time), but we always know its the best plan. I'll be praying for you and your family as you figure your way through this. That baby was lucky to have a mom like you who took care of them even before they were born! Let me know if you need anything.
Love you.
Cee
Oh, Nicki! I'm so sorry. Let me know if you need anything.
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